Intro: Do you feel like you were meant to have a kick-ass career as a hair stylist? Like you got into this industry to make big things happen?
Maybe you’re struggling to build a solid base and want some stability. Maybe you know social media is important, but it feels like a waste of time because you aren’t seeing any results. Maybe you’ve already had some amazing success but are craving more. Maybe you’re ready to truly enjoy the freedom and flexibility this industry has to offer.
Cutting and coloring skills will only get you so far, but to build a lifelong career as a wealthy stylist, it takes business skills and a serious marketing strategy. When you’re ready to quit just working in your business and start working on it, join us here where we share real success stories from real stylists.
I’m Britt Seva, social media and marketing strategist just for hair stylists, and this is the Thriving Stylist Podcast.
Britt Seva: What is up and welcome back to the Thriving Stylist Podcast. I’m your host, Britt Seva, and I have another episode for you, designed to be self-reflective more than anything.
Now I will say this has been on my heart and on my mind. I think it’s an important episode, but also I did something like this. I’m trying to remember now. I actually think I did it before the podcast even existed. I think I did it in 2015 when I first launched Thrivers Society online and I had a free resource PDF that people could download and it helped them to understand what type of stylist they were. I had categories like the Artist, the Entertainer, I had created all these categories and I had one where it was the Plane or something like that.
It basically was saying like a stylist or salon owner who doesn’t have a point of view yet, and people felt a type of way. It was a quiz that you took and the people who got put into the category of you’ve not developed essentially your X factors or your Zone of Genius or what makes you unique yet.
That pinched a nerve. People did not like that, and I totally get it because self-awareness is tough. I did an episode on this, probably it’s been a year ago now, where I talked about how the science has shown that, as a human species, self-awareness is an all-time low. I think it’s because we’re all caught up in social media and caught up in ourselves and the ego and all the things, and it’s hard to hear the feedback of you’re not quite there yet or people are likely having a hard time seeing what you’re trying to sell them.
That’s a tough pill to swallow, and so I’ve learned that lesson the hard way. Didn’t want to do that again, but the reason wanted to share this episode, which is digging into the question of are you currently a passive stylist? Are you currently an artist or are you truly a wealth builder?
I think it’s important to have for several reasons.
One, I’m big on self-awareness. It’s one of the core values in my company. We have six, it’s one of them. I was just telling an employee actually today that if I had to choose the one that’s the most important, it would be that one. I can work through a lot of challenges with my team members. Lack of self-awareness is one that’s really challenging because if you’re not aware of your strengths and weaknesses and faults, and it’s very difficult to coach somebody to a better place if they’re not self-aware, and that goes for us as individuals as well. If I’m not aware of my flaws, how can I ever get over them to get to a better place and find a solution, right?
The reason why I want to do this is because my hope is that you find yourself in one of these three categories, and maybe as you hear this, you’re already hoping that you’re one or another or you think that you may fall into one of these categories.
I want you to listen to the episode in full because I think it actually might surprise you.
The other reason why I think this is important is because for myself as a business coach, spoiler alert, I like coaching people to the place of being a wealth builder, which is the third category. That’s without a doubt what I do the best. I’ve taken tens of thousands of stylists to that place. I know how to do it. That’s not for everybody.
I’m a huge believer that nothing in this world is perfect for everyone. We’re all built very unique, our passion, our drive, what motivates us, what inspires us, our unique skillset, what lives in our heart, what lives in our mind, what lives in our spirit, what our goals are all very, very different.
I want everyone to know that if you listen to the show and you’re a passive stylist or you listen to the show and you’re an artist, I’m still here for you. I do deeply understand at the end of the day that while I do my best work when I’m coaching people to become wealth builders, I have a deep, sincere, and true love and appreciation for the industry as a whole. I think that the work we do is some of the most meaning and impactful work that people experience in a lifetime. I really think that we as stylists do get a chance to change lives, to impact a community.
I’ve shared this story so many times, but I will probably share it for the next 40 years and not feel bad about it, that the funeral I’ve attended with the highest attendance I’ve ever seen was that of my stylist. 20 years ago now, she was so beloved and sometimes I think to myself, did she even know what a huge powerful impact she made on literally hundreds of lives being a stylist? She wasn’t an educator, she wasn’t famous, she was just an incredible woman who did great hair.
It’s one of my favorite things about the industry is there’s very few professions where people can say that. I think back to my mother-in-law. My mother-in-law passed in 2021. She’s one of the greatest women I’ve ever known. I have to be careful talking about her so I don’t get upset. But she was a critical care nurse. I mean, just absolutely exceptional. You talk about somebody who literally saved lives for a living, she did that. When I think to the service we hosted for her, I mean, my gosh, it was beautiful. Senior surgeons from the hospital she worked at came where her fellow nurses were like, oh my gosh, “I can’t believe that doctor is not in the hospital practicing choosing to be at this service.” It was impactful, but there was probably 80 people there. I mean, it was beautiful, absolutely beautiful. She definitely impacted lives.
When I look back to my hair stylist, I mean there’s maybe 600 people there. You can’t compare.
I think so often in the industry, we look at the work that we do and we minimize it. We’re like, “Yeah, but I’m just doing hair.” It’s so much more complicated than that. It’s so much deeper than that.
I wanted to dedicate an episode to understanding where you’re at, respecting the decisions you’re making in this industry, and then choosing to pivot if it’s on your heart.
The first category I want to unpack is that of the passive stylist. I think some of you think that you’re wealth builders or you think that you’re artists and you’re actually passive.
Let’s dig into the qualities of the passive stylist. Passive stylists can be extremely talented, are often well-trained, and experienced. Now, not everybody is, but often they are. Passive stylists can have a completely full clientele. Passive stylists can be working up to 50 hours a week taking clients.
Here’s the first misconception, and when I say passive stylist, I don’t mean lazy. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m not saying unsuccessful, I’m saying passive, and I want to unpack why passive stylists are hopeful things will turn around. “Well, it’s kind of a tough year. Next year will be better.” “I’m hoping this new marketing thing I’m doing is going to pass out.” “I’m hoping I get some more referrals coming up next season.” “I’m hoping this new color line is going to change things for me.” “I’m really hoping if I learn this new skillset,” lot of hoping happens with the passive stylist.
The passive stylist works the schedule. They know clients want them to be working. That’s confusing.
The passive stylist is generally operating from a place of survival or fear, and so they’re like, “Well, I’m going to work the typical stylist schedule, which is Tuesday through Saturday and a mix of nights and weekends.” That to me is a very fear-based schedule, and you’re doing it because you don’t know any better or you assume that if you change it, your clients will be mad. Those are passive decisions. They are decisions, they’re common decisions, but they’re also very passive.
One, passive stylists focus on the things they’re comfortable with. By the way, we as humans don’t like being uncomfortable, so choosing to focus on the things you’re comfortable with doesn’t make you weird. It makes you normal, but it also makes you passive.
Passive stylists don’t invest in education because they don’t have the time, they don’t have the money and they don’t know where to start. Again, you’re comfortable. You’re hoping for the best. You’ve accepted things as they are. It is what it is, right? Passive.
They post on social media when they can if they like it. Some passive stylists are like, “Oh, I don’t even do that social media stuff,” or “I do it when I have time,” or “I’m taking a break.” Passive.
They run late or run long. Time is fluid, right? “Oh, my clients understand. My clients are all friends. They don’t mind.” That’s very passive.
When I was researching for this episode, I was looking up research studies of how to know when a business owner is checked out, how to know when a business owner has taken a passive approach on their business. One of the common things that said quite often is that studies show that when business operators run late, call in sick or run long, it’s a subconscious decision that they’re checking out of their own business. I thought those really fascinating. Remember as a new stylist, when you ran later ran long, you were like, oh my gosh, this is the worst.
And then the more senior you get, the more comfortable you get. You’re like, it’s fine. Passive feeling burnt out, feeling burnt out and staying in the burnout for more than a week or so passive, becoming resentful of your career, your salon, your salon owner, your situation, your income, your clients, all of those things make you a passive stylist when you’re just trying to get through the days.
Has anybody ever—like you wake up in the morning and your alarm goes off or you open your eyes and you’re like, “Here we go again,” and that’s the thought that crosses your mind. Huge indicator that you’re a passive stylist.
I had to tell you that’s not, I’m hesitant to use the word normal because I think it’s very common. That’s not the way it has to be, and that’s not how everyone operates. For me personally, I haven’t operated like that in, I don’t know, 15 years or something.
That’s not a feeling that you need to accept. It’s unusual. It’s a sign that something’s wrong. It’s not great.
Taking a passive approach too, that’s not good.
Here’s another thing about passive stylists. Sometimes they’re wonderful to work with. Passive stylists are not bad people, and I need you to understand that sometimes they’re great to work with, sometimes they’re toxic, and often that toxicity breeds from burnout, resentment, or they don’t know where to focus their energy. Things are not going like they want it to, but they don’t know how to fix it, so they become toxic because they can get jealous or they simply just need somewhere to direct that energy and they don’t know where else for it to go.
If you have a toxic stylist in your space, highly, highly likely that they’re passive. Even if they are making a decent amount of cash, highly, highly likely that they’re passive. Overall, this industry is taking a passive stylists for a ride. They’re in the passenger seat. Passive stylists have a thought process or may even verbally say, “Come what may,” or “It is what it is,” or “We’re all struggling here,” or “This industry is just hard.” Those are all very passive statements.
Something else that’s common, if you see a group of passive stylists together, they believe struggling is kind of cool and normal.
I remember I was doing hair in 2008, 2009. It was the beginning of, I think they called it the Great Recession. What was so cool at that time was couponing. It was so cool how much money you could save. Saving money and being broke was so cool. Being financially stable was uncool. It was such a strange time because so many people had lost their homes that they tried to make being broke and pinching pennies cool. It was so funny, but I can remember it so distinctly.
Thankfully for me at that time, I was a young 20 something with a child and I was broke, so it made me super cool. But when I realized this is not sustainable, this doesn’t work, and I started hanging out with people who also did not believe it was cool to be broke or in debt or struggling to get by, I realized how not normal that was.
But you know how people say you are the company you keep? When you’re hanging out with other passive stylists, they will convince you that being broke is cool and normal, so be very, very careful about that. Change is hard, so a lot of passive stylists would rather not have to go through the pain of changing and would rather just be comfortable where they’re at and let it be what it is.
For passive stylists, the work they do is just a job. It’s not a passion. Major success is not going to happen, but you’re doing it and it chips away at the bills, so be it. That’s what a passive stylist looks like.
What’s tricky is a lot of passive stylists aspire for more, but they’re not doing the work it takes to get there.
Let’s talk about the artists. The artists represent a good chunk of the industry. Artists see this as a true craft.
I looked up the definition of “artisan,” and it’s a worker in a skilled trade, especially one that involves making things by hand. I mean, hello. When I say that definition, some of you are like, “Yes, see, this is why we’re artists.” Some of you are like, “Okay, but not really.”
If you said, “Okay, but not really,” huge sign that you’re not an artist, but for those of you who clapped when I said that this might be you, those who show up in the industry as true artists are deeply authentic. They know who they are. They’re not going to sacrifice their values. They show up in whatever way feels most aligned and most true to them. That goes for how they show up in the salon, how they show up on social media, what their pricing looks like, what their guest experience looks like, all the ways they’re in this industry for the love of the industry and nothing more.
They truly believe in their craft and they do it because they enjoy the work they do. They’re very comfortable just getting by financially. They’re like, “Cool that we get to make money doing this amazing thing, but I do it. I love it. I really am passionate about having my hands in hair and doing the damn thing.” They’re fueled by the human connection and the impact. They like being the ride-or-die for their clients. They might even be the person that goes out to dinner with their client after they finish their hair for the day. They really support and rally for the clients in a very, very deep way. They’re fueled by that true, authentic, honest, sometimes vulnerable connection. They like to do things by their own rules.
Following social norms, not so good for an artist. They’re not into it. They often have a very unique guest experience. They aren’t lazy, but will not conform to those norms or standards. So if I say, these are the rules for Instagram, they’re like F your rules. I’m doing it how I want to do it. Very typical for an artist.
They often are really big into the community aspects of the industry without interest in becoming an influencer. They like the networking. They like getting to see their Instagram friends in real life. They like going to classes and meeting new people. They like engaging with educators. They like building amongst people who are not in the industry and just becoming a pillar of their community without any financial expectation on that. They just enjoy doing it. If they post on social media, their feed is from the heart and does not follow any strategic norms or rules.
That all sounds so beautiful. It’s like, wow. They’re like the unsung heroes. Artists have the servant’s heart and servant’s heart is a very common tie that buys in the industry. There is a huge correlation between those who become nurses, teachers, and hair stylists. If you are like, “I’m a stylist, I thought about being a teacher,” “I’m a stylist. I thought about being a nurse,” a lot of teachers said they consider being a stylist and vice versa all the way around, it’s because we enjoy serving and helping people. It’s part of our DNA, it’s how we’re wired.
I think artists feel that to the umpteenth degree. It’s just a little more on the surface for them.
Here’s the thing about that. They often don’t reach their fullest financial potential, but find deep emotional fulfillment and are very beloved, so their heart’s full.
I’ll be honest, I don’t coach to the artist a lot, but I know that you’re there and I know that you exist, and I think that your impact to the industry is gorgeous. I think it’s worth talking about if you listen to this episode and you’re like, “I feel like I’d be selling out,” or “Maybe the money’s not important to me. Is there something wrong with me?” No, you might just be an artist and that’s okay. It might not be about the money for you.
There’s somebody I was talking to recently who was like, “I’m really thinking about turning my salon into a nonprofit”, meaning it’s not a money maker at all, and they would feel good about that. That’s coming from a place of being an artist.
Then let’s talk about the wealth builder. A wealth builder sees themself as a business owner or an entrepreneur.
Let me tell you something. Being a business owner or an entrepreneur is hard. It means making decisions that will make people sad. It means doing things that will make people upset with you. It means there’s a statement called the entrepreneurial commitment, and it’s that you put the needs of the business ahead of anything and everything else.
That’s not for everybody. That means you self-sacrifice. You sacrifice your family. Sometimes you make hard decisions with your team, you make hard decisions with your client, but you can build wealth in the process. Some people say that’s what makes you a sellout. I don’t believe that and I’ll tell you why.
I think that you can be a wealth builder and still be a really great kind, empathetic person who’s not a human doormat. A lot of times people say things like, “Well, if you’re letting go of team members, you’re firing stylists, you’re firing clients, you don’t have empathy.” You can be empathetic and still put your own wants and needs first. You can be empathetic and still want to have a profitable business. Both things can be true, and that’s one of the things about this industry that’s really backwards.
We’re one of the only industries that talks badly about people making money. It’s very strange. Does everybody realize that? It is extremely strange. I am a business person. I run a company, an S corp, and I have employees. Essentially, I run a very corporate style of business, but I coach hair stylists, so I network with people who run businesses like mine, much more traditional business coaching, stuff like that. When I go and tell people who I coach and what I coach, I coach stylists and salon owners, the face they make is always like, “Oh my gosh, that’s an industry that needs a lot of help.”
First of all, when people say that, I get very defensive. Just so you know, I never roll with that. I’m like, “Let me teach you a little something. Let me educate you about my industry and show you what it’s actually all about.”
But they’re not wrong because most of our industry does not think like business people. We are the only industry that for some reason does not think like business owners. It’s very strange and it’s got to be rooted in the heritage and the history and the artisanal values of the work that we do, and we work with our hands and all the stuff, and I get it.
Go back to the person you were when you joined cosmetology school. Did you say, “I’m going to do this and I’m going to be broke,” or did you say, “I’m going to do this and I do want to build wealth for myself and yeah, I want to do the artist stuff and yeah, I want to love my clients and yeah, I want to do what I do, but I also want to build a great life for myself. I want to have a family and I want to support them debt free. I want to be a homeowner one day. I want to be able to take vacations and not have to put it on the credit card. I want to be able to retire.”
If you wanted those things, you have to run your business as a business. There is no other way to do it.
Point number two has big financial goals and dreams. You aspire, you want to go places.
Number three, again, if you listen to this show, we talk about money. It’s a good thing. You want to have nice things and nice things is very relative. If you’ve seen me, if you’re watching this on video now, I don’t wear expensive clothes. I don’t buy expensive things, like I don’t carry expensive handbags. I don’t drive an expensive car. I don’t like nice things in that sense. But for me, I want to create amazing memories for my family. However I want to do it and not have to worry about it. So when I say nice things, it doesn’t even have to be physical things. Sometimes it’s just financial peace of mind. Sometimes it’s being able to take a luxury trip, a luxury vacation.
Maybe it is you want to carry a $6,000 handbag, have at it, whatever it is. If you want to have nice things, that will be hard if you are a passive stylist or an artist. Think about retirement and financial planning, prioritizes paid education and mentorship.
Every time I pay for education, I make more money on the flip side, so I’m paying for education all the time.
Network with other people who want to be successful in the industry. Wealth builders are networkers. When they say your network is your net worth, that is the truth. I’ve learned that lesson and I’m an introvert, so if you’re hearing that from me, the biggest introvert on the planet and by biggest introvert on the planet, my team’s nickname for me is Track Star because when we host an in-person event, I will be the last person in and the first person to leave every single time. But I have a great network because I know it’s critical to my life and my business prioritizes growing financially by 15 to 20% a year. If you’re not growing at that rate, the cost of living will outpace you. Chooses to scale back and refine their schedule every year. The client doesn’t make the calls on the schedule. You make the calls.
Believes in short-term sacrifice for long-term gain, sometimes aspires to be the breadwinner winner or fully financially independent, has a massive amount of drive.
And often in Enneagram three or would describe themselves as an achiever.
Wealth builders are simply built a little bit differently. When you look at our industry, I’m not even going to give stats or figures right now, I just want you to think about the stylists, the stylists you’ve come across, the stylists you’ve met, are more of them struggling or are more of them doing financially amazing? More of them are struggling. Becoming a wealth builder is not easy. It doesn’t mean it’s not worth it, and I want you to really think to yourself, what do you want this lifetime to look like? Do you want to impact lives?
I think most of us do, not everybody does. I think most of us do. Do you want some of the lives to be impacted, to be the lives of the people who live in your home? When you talk about impacting lives or changing social norms, does that start with you?
For me, one of my whys is I wanted to change the narrative for essentially what my mom, my sister, and what I was set up to go through. I didn’t want to repeat that pattern. I wanted to do something different and show my children what was really possible. I needed to build a wealthy life in order to make that possible, or the pattern would’ve repeated itself and it was something that was important to me did not happen.
I want you to think to yourself what are you looking to create using this profession as your vehicle?
Last thing I want to say, everybody in this industry is an artist. Everybody in this industry is an entrepreneur. Everybody loves their clients, at least most of them on the good days. So if you’re like, “I’m a wealth builder, but I think there’s a bit of artist in me too,” that doesn’t make you weird, that makes you normal. If you say, “I’m a passive stylist, but I really want to be an entrepreneur,” perfect. I want you to think to yourself of these three categories, which suits you the most and are you happy with that? If the one that suits you the most you’re not happy with, what way do you want to shift to get to where you want to be?
I will say, if you’re going to hybrid any of these things, you need to be at least 80% in the category that you really want to be in. You can dabble 20% in the others and see some results, but 80% in the category that really speaks to your soul is probably about the best you can do in my opinion. Go a hundred percent all in on the one that feels aligned for you in the work that you’re doing in this industry.
As I always like to say, so much love, happy business building, and I’ll see you on the next one.
